You guys…. how come no one warned me to slow down and not grow up?
Oh…. yeah, okay I guess quite a few people did. But why didn’t I listen?! Don’t get me wrong, it’s fun, but man is it also really taxing on my anxiety.
After a real conversation Sunday night about buying a house, and pouring over our excel spreadsheets (which are insanely helpful to keep each of our income vs bills each month in line, as well as to show us how we would fair buying a house), I went to bed exhausted.
Jokes on me because I did not sleep! When I’m really anxious over something, I do this awful thing where I dream that I am doing whatever stressed me out. When I used to work as a waitress, I would wake up in the middle of the night thinking I had missed a table. Sunday night, I woke up thinking I was working in our excel sheets.
When I was able to get back to bed, between tossing and turning and these awful stress-dreams, I was having freaky dreams about some of my deepest fears. I woke up before my alarm because I was afraid I was going to miss it, and the day only threw more crap at me.
The Monday-est Monday
I forgot it was PJ day at work until I was less than a minute away from the office.
I forgot to bring in my pajama donations for Casey Cares also.
The Panera was closed and I had to drive there and back to the office twice to get our order, which I placed in advance last week.
Our Tax lady was overwhelmed and I sat on her floor for three hours preparing documents.
I played phone tag with two very important companies all day.
I then spent an hour in the post office after I had gotten off work to make sure all the documents were sent correctly.
I had sass and bull crap throw at me.
And I handled it all with grace. Pure, smile on my face, it really didn’t bother me like I expected, GRACE!
The Grace of God. I woke up and prayed, asked God to take it away, to help me through everything, and to have a great day.
I grabbed my essential oils, covered myself in them, and got down to business! The above items were a nuance, but no reason to ruin my day! I’m alive, healthy, functioning, capable, and deserved to have a good day!
It is 100% a mental exercise. Did I want to be rude back to people, of course. Did I want to huff and puff at the post office, sure… but those workers had been dealing with last minute tax people all day anyway.
In conclusion 🙂
What you put out in the world will come back to you my friends! Do a quick mental scan. Are you mostly negative (either out loud or mentally to yourself) and do you experience negativity regularly? YES
I know because I’ve been there! I’ve super malleable, and negativity gets me down and I can get out. So I cut out that negative, and negative people, and I spew kindness like the common cold.
Give Kindness & Get Kindness
Be Positive & Get Positivity
You will have to continually work at it, and some days you will fail, but you will be so better for it- I promise.